Self-Talk

Self-talk occurs when we think about something (Weinberg & Gould, 2015). Three main categories of self-talk: positive, neutral, and negative (Weinberg & Gould, 2015). In psychology, the ABC’s of behavior are often discussed. The theory is that all behaviors (B) have antecedents (A) and consequences (C). Here is a fun clip from The Office to explain this. In the clip, Jim uses the computer sound as the antecedent. The behavior is Dwight taking the mint. The consequence is how Dwight’s mouth feels. When the behavior is removed, the consequence still occurs.

Antecedent
Behavior
Consequence
A teacher blows a whistle.
Children run to form a line.
Teacher thanks the children.
Athlete misses a shot.
Athlete says, “You idiot. How did you miss that?” to self.
Athlete feels bad about performance.

When we try to control our self-talk, we are trying to control that specific behavior. Like with other behaviors, we can train ourselves to behave differently by modifying the antecedent or monitoring our behavior closely. In the next sections, we will learn the types of self-talk and what type we should use most often.

When we are performing, self-talk is the key to controlling what is happening in our mind (Williams, Zinsser, & Bunker, 2015 ). By controlling the behavior, we control the consequence. Think back to the clip from The Office. Jim was controlling the consequence by inserting a behavior into Dwight’s routine. We can do this with self-talk as well!

Once we learn how to control our self-talk, we can use if for several things. We can use self-talk to learn new skills, change bad habits, control our attention, creating an optimal attitude or mood, control effort, change our mood or attitude, build self-efficacy, increase confidence, and maintaining good behaviors (Williams et al., 2015).

Types of Self-Talk

Three main categories of self-talk: positive, neutral, and negative (Weinberg & Gould, 2015). Positive self-talk can be used to increase energy, effort, or attitude; it can be used to instruct or control anxiety (Weinberg & Gould, 2015). Neutral self-talk consists of irrelevant thoughts (Weinberg & Gould, 2015). Negative self-talk is critical or self-demeaning; these thoughts are counterproductive and increase self-doubt and anxiety (Weinberg & Gould, 2015).  Negative self-talk includes worry, disengagement, or somatic failure (Weinberg & Gould, 2015).

How can it decrease performance?

Negative self-talk is critical or self-demeaning; these thoughts are counterproductive and increase self-doubt and anxiety (Weinberg & Gould, 2015).  Negative self-talk includes worry, disengagement, or somatic failure (Weinberg & Gould, 2015). Negative self-talk is unhelpful. It offers no focus on how to improve. It is usually worrying about the future or ruminating about past failures. It is NOT constructive. It can be a cognitive interference and distract us from our performance.

How can it improve performance?

Positive self-talk can help us increase energy, effort, or attitude; it can be used to instruct or control anxiety (Weinberg & Gould, 2015).

Strategies to Pivot

Strategy 1: Thought-stopping. To stop our negative self-talk, we must first recognize that we are speaking negatively to ourselves. This is a skill, so it takes time and practice. When we find ourselves engaging in negative self-talk, we simply stop it. That sounds easy, right? This strategy should not be used alone; it should be paired with another strategy.

Ironic errors happen when we are told not to think about or do something and then we might accidentally do it or think about it because we were trying to avoid it.

These can occur with self-talk as well. If we are trying to reduce the amount of negative self-talk, rather than focusing on avoiding negative self-talk, we would be better served to focus on adding or converting to positive self-talk.

Strategy 2: Reframing Self-Talk. Essentially, this is converting criticism (negative self-talk) to correction (positive self-talk). When you find yourself engaging in self-talk, you can try to convert this to a positive statement. A more tangible way to do this is to make these conversions on paper. This makes it easier to see trends in your self-talk. This is especially helpful if you tend to make the same negative statements.

As you do this, pay attention to the situations (the antecedents) that were occurring when you make the negative self-talk statements. As you recognize situations that lead to negative self-talk, you may be more prepared to stop, modify, or convert your negative self-talk. We take that proverb, “If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all” and convert it to, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then at least add something informative to it.”

We can add some instruction or helpful information to our negative self-talk. This is a good start to converting your negatives to positives. However, unless you really believe the positive statements, they will not be helpful.

Strategy 3: Cognitive Restructuring. A more in-depth approach is cognitive restructuring. It follows a similar process, but rather than just converting the negative, you are challenged to present evidence to dispute your negative thinking. If you have a tendency to doubt your own thinking, this strategy might be most helpful for you. Here is an example:

​A- Antecedent Situation
​B- Behavior Negative Self-Talk Statement (NSTS)
C- Consequences Feelings/Reactions to NSTS
​D- Dispute Rational Evidence to Counter NSTS
​Fouled in final ten seconds with game tied- missed free throw.
​“I lost the game for the team.” OR “I always choke in pressure situations.
​”Depressed, tensed up, blew defensive assignment after free throw.
​“Hey, I’m disappointed but that was just one point out of 40 minutes of play.”
​Assessment of knee strength in rehab occurred and the athlete performed below expectations.
​“I am weaker than I should be right now.” OR “I am never going to get back to playing.”
​Depressed, tense, did not work hard during rest of rehab session.
​“I’m upset, but my knee is stronger than it was a week ago.” “I’ve had great rehab sessions. This was just an off day.”

Variation: Think-Feel-Do Chart (From talk therapy). One strategy that comes straight from psychology and talk therapy is using a think-feel-do chart to understand the consequences of your thoughts and reframe them. This is a variation is much cleaner and better for those of us who tend to maybe continue silently arguing with the “Dispute” statements above. This is an example.

The idea with restructuring is that external events are neutral until we engage in self-talk and make them positive or negative. Once we label the events, then we have the responses. So, an event occurs. We think about it and chat with ourselves (Think). That chat leads to emotions (Feel). Those emotions impact our next actions (Do).

Enhancing the Positive. If you’ve recently been caught up in the Marie Kondo de-cluttering phenomenon, you might see a connection here. In Kondo’s decluttering method, we are asked to hold each item that we own and ask ourselves if it sparks joy. If it does, we keep it and we store it with respect. If it does not spark joy, we discard the item...after we thank it for its service or the lessons that it taught us. Essentially, before we let go we reflect on the item, how and why we acquired it, and why we no longer need to keep it. Kondo teaches tidying strategies, but at the heart of her tidying method is gratitude. We should be thankful that we have these items and live a life wherein we use them. How does this relate to self-talk?

I ask you this: are you as kind to yourself as Marie Kondo is to her socks? Do you thank yourself for what you’ve done so far in life? Do you take a moment to acknowledge your efforts and abilities? When you look at yourself as a whole person, do you spark joy in yourself?

If not, then positive self-talk could be a great tool for you. Remember the ABC’s of behavior. If we change our behavior, in this case our self-talk, then the consequences of that behavior should change as well.

To improve the positive self-talk we can:

1. Keep phrases short and specific. 2. Use first person, present tense. 3. Stay positive. 4. Say it with meaning and attention. 5. Speak kindly. 6. Repeat often.

Training Questions

Using your mental performance log, answer these questions. Remember that the more thought and effort you put into them, the more you'll get from the experience.

1. Can you think of a time when self-talk negatively impacted your performance? Explain.

2. Can you think of a time when self-talk positively impacted your performance? Explain.

3. Which of the strategies will you use to improve your future performances? Explain why you selected those strategies.